She Despised Him...

I read something this morning that spoke to me.

It was the story of a woman, in love with a man.

She was the daughter of a king.

She loved a man the king despised.

The king knew she loved him, so he used her in an attempt to get him killed.

The bride price he named for her involved slaying 100 enemy soldiers - alone.

The king never expected him to come through it alive.

But he did.

And Princess Michal married the man she loved.

But the treachery did not stop there. The king decided to come after him at his home! He sent his henchmen to deal with it once and for all. But Princess Michal heard about the plan, and managed to help him escape from a window, and arranged a clothed idol with goat hair in his place, informing his assailants that he was very sick and could not leave his bed. That bought the man she loved enough time to get away from danger.

She didn't see him again for many years. In the meantime, the king gave her to another man, to be his wife. David, meanwhile, took two other women to be his wives. When the king was killed in battle, and David was crowned instead, to be king, he sent for Michal to be brought to him, stating, not that he loved her, but that she was bought and paid for. The man she had been with all these years, followed behind her, weeping, as she was taken to David.

Like many in royal lines, her opinions were not considered. She was passed back and forth as a political pawn. And while it is stated that Michal loved David, it is never said that he loved her in return. It is easy to see why the pain in her would have turned to bitterness. And how looking down at him, dancing wildly in his joy of bringing the symbol of God's presence into his city, might have understandably made her despise him in her heart.

And then comes a line about how she never bore any children. Now that may be just how she was physically made up. But often in the Bible, this infers that God was displeased and so withheld this gift. How true this is, I don't know. Jesus definitely challenged some of these conceptions when he walked with us. But the ancient Jewish people certainly believed it.

So we are left with a woman,

in love with a man,

protecting him at risk to her own life,

passed on to another, who it seems did love her,

taken from him simply because David owned her, not because he loved her,

and then, when her heart had darkened towards him,

there was perceived judgement against her.

It seems harsh when we put ourselves in her shoes and see her as a real woman and what she was dealing with. But then I understood something.

David was definitely no saint. He behaved poorly at times. Sometimes horrifically! That was between him and God, and it was up to him to sort that out - which he eventually did. But no matter how poorly he had treated Michal, God did not like that she despised David. Even just in her heart. That was her thing she needed to work out with God. And it never says she did. No matter how David was failing her, she needed to be true to who God wanted her to be. And that's where we come in.

We are all broken people. We all mess up in our relationships. Sometimes we will never hear the apology we ache for. Sometimes the offence will not just fade away. But we need to be careful. That is the other person's offense. They need to deal with it before God. But we cannot allow that offense to cause us to despise them, even just in our hearts. As hard as it may be, we need to give that to God too. So we can be who he made us to be. And not be broken down by darkened thoughts and emotions.

No photo credit